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Quite a short rant today, but heartfelt all the same. What do people expect me to do when I read the "Baby on board" or "Small person on board" sticker in the back window of their car? Do they seriously think I'm going to allow a bit more space in front of me in case the small person suddenly chews through its harness, throws open the car door and flings itself under my wheels? Well, they're in for a disappointment, because I'm already driving at what I consider a safe distance behind them, as I do with all other traffic on the road. Or perhaps they're trying to warn me that their own driving may be a bit erratic, as they are constantly having to turn round and coo at the little darling or sing little nursery songs to keep it amused, or pick its little rusk out of the ashtray? No, I don't think so. What they're doing is bragging. They're so proud that they've actually managed to do what millions of other couples (and many thousands of single people too) have done since the dawn of time, what animals do with monotonous regularity and without conscious thought, what even single-celled organisms do every day. They've actually produced a baby. Well, I am impressed. I've had two myself (my wife helped a bit) and I'm in a position to tell them to wait until the little bugger's fifteen and see if they're still so bloody pleased with themselves. These days I've got certain other things in my life that I'm proud of. I wrote the most brilliant formula into an Excel spreadsheet the other night. I think I'll put a sticker in my car window saying "Incredible bloody genius on board" and see if that gets me any respect from other road users. And then there's "Caution - show dogs in transit". I rest my case. either on this site or on the World Wide Web. This site created and maintained by PlainSite |